Principles

Your Life is a Movie- Keep it Simple

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A man cannot be comfortable without his own approval.
Mark Twain

Sometimes life is complex. There’s war over conflicting issues. There’s a million things to do and not enough time to do it. The movies make things seem so simple. Sometimes it’s frustratingly simple, “You love her just say so and then we can cut an hour off this really long movie” you think to yourself. How can you get this simplicity in your life? Just take a step back and look at yourself objectively, as if you were watching your own life’s movie.

Don’t go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.
Mark Twain

Sometimes the simple things will jump out at you. You realize you should say “I’m sorry” first because in the end to have a happy ending someone needs to cave and you may as well be the good guy in your movie. You can stop pursuing money and realize how precious your family is now before the crisis happens (heart attach, lost job).

Don’t part with your illusions. When they are gone you may still exist, but you have ceased to live.
Mark Twain

I was reading Mark Twain’s biography and was saddened that despite all his success he directly brought on himself many of his problems. He loved his wife, his kids, the perfect house, he had great fame and was making plenty of money. So what does he do? He tries to pursue more money and almost loses it all. His lavish lifestyle (spending $30,000 a month on the upkeep of his house in the late 1800s) forced him to close his beloved  house and move to Europe where his family is seperated and isn’t comfortable. He has so much debt he’s forced to go bankrupt. To recover, he’s forced into touring which he dreads and leaves his beloved family for long stretches. If you were Mark Twain wouldn’t you have quit spending money just a little earlier and then your could have had everything.

You’re life’s a move- be the star.

Always do right. This will gratify some people and astonish the rest.
Mark Twain

Principles

How are Mortgage Professionals Like Doctors and Why It Matters to Your Profession?

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I was reading the results of a consumer report survey that said 78% of respondents said that lenders need to be reined in. This surprised me. Sure those lending professionals who were unethical should be reigned in (and many are in front page headlines) but that’s not 78%. Could it be that those few unethical lending professionals made a bad name for all? Could it be that people are just looking for a skapegoat for their financial problems? I’m sure there’s some truth to both of these reasons but I suspect there’s something more fundamental going on that I read about in Malcolm Gladwell’s book “Blink.”

In Section five of the book entitled “Listening to Doctors” Gladwell talks about various studies on the incidences of malpractice among doctors.  The studies show that the risk of being sued for malpractice has little to do with the number of mistakes you make. In fact there he found something completely different.

He found the element that corresponded most to the risk of doctors being sued was: how the patients were treated on a personal level by their doctor.  Did they have a relationship with their doctor?  Was he snotty with them?  Negative?  Condescending?

One study Gladwell mentions provides some interesting pointers to you, no matter what your profession. Doctors who spent even a few minutes longer in consultations with patients, who gave orienting comments explaining the process, who were active listeners and who had a sense of humor/tried to be funny were much much much less likely to be sued for malpractice even though they made just as many mistakes as other doctors (who WERE sued).

Gladwell brings out instances where patients went to lawyers and said “I want to sue my specialist”. After reviewing the case the lawyer would say actually it wasn’t the specialist that was at fault it’s your primary doctor. The patient would insist on suing the wrong doctor, despite the evidence, just because they felt like they were not treated well.

Gladwell points out that it is all about your tone of voice with your clients, are you dominant or concerned?  That one aspect (tone of voice) makes all the difference in the world.

So…how are you treating your clients these days? How long does it take you to return a client’s phone call? When was the last time you sat down with a client to actually explain your opinion letter to them?

 

Goal

You Will Only Get What You Want, If You Ask For It

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You can’t always get what you wantgetwhat1280x1024.jpg
And if you try sometime you find
You get what you need

Rolling Stones

The simple rule “you will only get what you want if you ask for it” is very powerful in two ways.

1) People won’t know what you want unless you ask. That’s why it’s important to have a goal. What do you really want? Now go ask for it. You just might get it. Example: Ask for that girl’s number.

2) Be more forceful when you ask for what you want. Sometimes you just need to be more confident or clear when you ask for what you want. This works well when dealing with bureaucracies. The rep on the phone may not have the power to get you what you want but his manager might. If not try that manager above. Example: I used this today to get my loan rate lock-in extended and I was dealing with a big bank.

I’ve heard many stories of how this works well for credit card late fees also. A classmate in graduate school said he used this successfully five times in the previous year. Then finally one of the companies caught on and said they can no longer waive the late fee because he used it numerous times. Three levels of management later and he got it waived again! But this time he promised the manager, it was the “last time”.

photo credit: geishaboy500

Automate, Success Machine, system

The Perfect New Year’s Resolution

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I think new years resolutions are too random- why start losing weight on January 1. It’s such a random date. I suggested you start now– whenever you are reading this. Go ahead I’ll wait.

But there is one item that makes sense to start with January 1st- gain control of of your finances. January 1st is good because you know exactly when you started your tracking. You know how to gain control of your finances, but here’s a refresher:

  • Figure out what you spend money on.
  • Determine where you can save money (I called up my cell phone company and saved $32 a month by switching to a different plan and canceling phone insurance)
  • Set up a budget- Save all you can
  • Find ways to earn more

The hardest part of this is getting started. Do you know what you spend money on? I suggest you build a system (a machine) to make this automatic. Get your bank and credit cards to automatically update your data in a personal finance program like Quicken or Money or online at a site like Mint.

There will be some setup time but in the future you’ll be able to just click a couple of buttons and you’ll know exactly where you stand financially.

Enjoy, Leadership, Motivation, Passion

How To Fight The Quality Of Life Deamons and Win

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While others are wasting time making new year’s resolutions to lose weight and fail, you can set a better new year’s resolution: to improve the quality of your life.

Say No To Others

People will always be offering you new projects (because you’re so good at your existing ones) or new social opportunities- just say no if you don’t want it.

Say No To Yourself

As a high achiever you will always want to do more. Just say no to yourself unless it directly helps you achieve your goals.

Set Aside Me Time

When you set aside time to do things you enjoy don’t give up that time. Don’t let your other tasks bleed into your time.

Watch Your Goals

At all times you want to keep on eye on your goals. In every action be mindful of what you ultimately want to accomplish.

Take Enjoyment From Everything You Do

Live in the moment. Look for opportunities to enjoy what you do.

Make The Best Of Your Situation

After years of hard work a friend was recently promoted to a senior role in his organization. Now he’s complaining the challenge is gone because the team he assembled can handle everything. So he’s thinking of going to another company so he start the fight again. Rather than moving on he should seek the challenges in his current role. Try to double revenue. Try to make the company better. Try to make the world better. With the machine he’s assembled he can achieve a lot more.

Happy New Year- beat those deamons.

Health

How To Lose Your Holiday Weight Now- Before The Holidays

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As the New Year rolls in people will make their new year’s resolution- lose the holiday weight. Here’s a safe, natural way to lose the holiday weight now- no pills, no machines no exercise- guaranteed. Best of all this solution is free. Don’t gain weight over the holiday season, then you don’t need to lose it after.

The key is preparation. Read: Eat What You Love. It tells you how to eat what you love and not worry about your weight. (It’s a quick read)

Automate, Delegate, Eliminate

The Two Minute Guide To Getting Started With Productivity

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1) Get your to do list out of our head

SAF#2The mind is for generating ideas, not storing them. Don’t keep your to do list in your head- you risk forgetting something. Plus with your mind freed from your to do list it can work on generating better ideas.

2) If It Takes Two Minutes Or Less Do It Now

If you can do something in 2 minutes or less, dont put it on any lists, just do it. You’ve already accomplished something. This is especially true for tasks you need to delegate e.g. have other people help you with.

3) Be Conscious In Whatever You Do

While working on something, even (especially) routine tasks, ask yourself, why am I doing this? How can I stop doing it? How can I do it better? Asking yourself these three questions will help you improve quality, eliminate unnecessary tasks and gives you automation opportunities.

photo credit: Roby Ferrari

Principles

Can Someone Create Automatic Wealth Without Creating A Success Making Machine

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As I scanned though my huge daily reading list I saw a title that obviously intrigued me. I eagerly read  How to Change Your Work Habits and Become a Success Machine by Michael Masterson, who has written Automatic Wealth. I enjoyed the story about how he turned into a straight A student and it was motivating but he missed one of the key features of a machine: a machine is automatic (like “Automatic Wealth”). Here’s how his machine helped him:
* once he got used to sitting in front of the class (which is conducive to learning), classroom success was automated.
* once he developed the early to rise habit he automatically maximized each day
* once he developed the learning muscle- learning more, for longer hours, wasn’t that hard
A machine is not about doing hard work. A machine turns hard work into easy or automated work.
Enjoy, Passion

The Right Way To Take A Vacation- Five Ways to Balance

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We all look forward to vacation. It’s a time to relax and enjoy ourselves. There’s just one problem- we spend the week before vacation packing, making arrangements and making sure work is taken care of. Then we spend the week after vacation unpacking and catching up. So we basically sandwiched our relaxing vacation between two hyper, active periods.

So you’re saying “at least I’m enjoying my vacation”- right? Wrong! Some people spend their vacation running to catch every tour- how is that relaxing? Others may take a “relaxing” vacation on the beach. But let’s think this through. After working hard all year and being extra active the week prior to vacation, is sitting and doing absolutely nothing for a long time good? All their creativity and energy is wasted. And just sitting isn’t necessarily giving enjoyment. Energy cant be stored from vacation and brought into real life.

The problem is there’s no balance. No balance the week before- too much activity. No balance the week after- too much to catch up on. No balance on vacation- too much or too little activity during the vacation. The solution, of course, is better balance.

Balance With Smaller Vacations

Instead of going on long vacations consider taking numerous long weekends as vacations. It allows you to have frequent balances against your daily grind. Plus you wont miss much at “work” being out for a short time.

Balance Your Long Vacations

Include a day on each side of your trip to pack and relax at home (and/or do some errands). This will allow you to start your vacation leisurely and transition to real life at the end your vacation. This way you wont need a vacation after your vacation.

Balance Your Leisure

A resting vacation (e.g. sitting by the pool) doesn’t have to be all vegging. Challenge yourself to swim some laps or have other fun in the pool- giving you some exercise. (Plus if you keep eating out this will help keep the weight off). Also have a pad next to you at all times. Now that your brain has a chance to relax you’ll find yourself more inspired with more ideas than ever.

On my recent vacation I did this and came up with this article and other solutions to problems I’ve been working on.

Balance Your Itinerary

Just because you are in a foreign city it doesn’t mean you must spend every waking minute exploring it. Do touring as long as you enjoy it- you don’t have to see everything. Take some time to “relax” also. On relaxing vacation don’t sit at the beach till the last second which would cause a stressful run to catch your plane.

Balance Your Bad Days

If you’re feeling stresses by your day to day- just take a random day off. Just sleep late and treat yourself to some rejuvenation and fun. It will give you an instant productivity boost.

So relax and enjoy your vacation.